Category: LifeStyle
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Staycation in the Hamptons
After being stuck quarantined in my 1 bedroom apartment, I really needed some time away from the city. My parents were kind enough to lend us their house in East Hampton at the tip of Long Island. Its a cozy place that is super close to both the town and the beach. My parents have had the house since I was born, but have added an addition and some other upgrades to the house since. This is honestly one of my favorite places in the world.
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How to feel grounded in a crazy world
I’ve struggled a lot with my mental health over the years. After struggling for a really long time in my late teens and early 20s, I’ve now been on the same prescription cocktail for several years now. My longest lasting relationship is my therapist and I would probably never leave the east coast because of her. I struggled for years trying to find “a magic pill” to make my minor problems (which seemed like huge emotional hurtles) go away. I then found Dialectic Behavioral Therapy (DBT) and I found a logical way of dealing with my illogical problems without making myself feel invalidated or “crazy.”
In times like these, when things seem so out of control and crazy, I like to fall back on some basic DBT skills to cope with all the insanity. These are very difficult times for everyone right now, but especially hard for people of color and people affected by covid-19. Using these skills may help you feel more grounded. Please read this link for more detailed information, but below is my interpretation of the essential DBT skills.
- Mindfulness
- Mindfulness is essentially living in the moment. Don’t worry about what could happen in the future, just focus on how you can help yourself in the next 5 minuets.
- Distress Tolerance
- DBT has a “Do What Works” policy for distress tolerance (obviously without harming yourself). Let it out, scream, cry, smash something! Your emotions are temporary and you will get past this.
- Interpersonal Effectiveness
- One of my favorite worksheets from this section is called “D.E.A.R. M.A.N.” and it’s about how to ask for things you need in a way that will get you what you want.
- Emotional Regulation
- This is the hardest. This skill focuses on regulating your internal emotions by learning where they come from, validating that they are a real emotion coming from a real place, and then learning to get past it and let that feeling go.
More reading on DBT:
Dialectical Behavior Therapy on Psychology Today , Mind Well NYC, Overview of DBT on Psych Central
- Mindfulness
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Quarantine Home Decor – Part 2
I realize I make a lot of ridiculous purchases, however, this one I think takes the cake. I bought a hammock chair with this huge indoor hammock chair stand. Totally ridiculous, but also totally completely relaxing. I put the chair in my bedroom which is far away from my computer desk. I don’t want to even think about a computer when I’m in the hammock.
Once I sit in that chair at the end of the day, and the sun is exactly in the right place to engulf the entire chair in sunlight, it creates a magical experience that helps make you feel like your outside. I open my window to get a nice breeze and to hear the birds. I recently got a little wind chime bell that will help create a calming environment. All of these things put together really help me relax at the end of the day.
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#BLM Blackout
It’s been a crazy couple of weeks so far. I’ve been muted on my social media for the black lives matter protests. The voice of people who look like me have been heard for so long, I wanted to take the time and let others speak and be heard.
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All Dressed Up with Nowhere to Go
So after several days in sweatpants and hoodies, I had enough! It’s friday, and I need to figure out a way to make it feel like the weekend, even though all these days are blending together like a fruit smoothie. After taking a hot shower, I put on these wide leg pants (yes, they where still stretchy) and a short, almost cropped, striped shirt. then I went all out on my hair and makeup just to make me feel special.
My boyfriend and I then put on #coach lands streaming on Twitch. We shut off the lights and turned up the volume on the great stereo system that is in the house we are staying in during this pandemic. After a couple of drinks and several hours of shuffle dancing, we felt like we were at a concert.
My boyfriend also ordered this huge bluetooth speaker because he thinks large events like concerts and festivals will be postponed until fall of 2021.
This speaker is load and powerful enough to create a concert-like “main-stage”
experience. We are planning on testing it next week. -
Escaping Corona
I’ve escaped NYC to head out to Long Island, where there are still lots of sick people, but this way I can be quarantined with my boyfriend and out of a hot spot in Brooklyn near lots of corona cases. My parents are staying put on the Upper West Side where the number of cases are smaller but there is already a person who tested positive in their building.
Because I have psoriasis and take an immune suppressant called Stelara, so I have to be extra careful and cannot get sick. I also have asthma and a history of bad upper respiratory infections. Corona for me would not be “just another flu,” getting sick is actually a matter of life and death for me.
It shocking to me that people are still not taking social distancing seriously. One of the reasons I left the city is because when I would go running in prospect park I saw lots of people out exercising, taking pictures, playing with their kids, or even just trying to pass the time while either working from home or not working at all. “Its no big deal”, “Its just the flu”, you say … or you’re thinking “I won’t actually get ‘sick’ sick”. This is type of thinking is what will kill me, my parents, and even maybe your parents. #stayinghomesaveslives
I’ve had to stop taking my skin medication Stelara to enhance my immune system. Before starting Stelara I had flaky, itchy plaques of psoriasis all over my body. I even had pustule psoriasis on the palms of my hands which was a negative side effect of another medication I used to take called Enbrel. Since starting Stelara over 5 years ago, I barely have skin breakouts anymore. However, now that I’ve had to stop taking my medication, my skin is seriously suffering.
I’ve purchased a narrow band UVB therapy light, and I have steroid topical creams I can use, but I can’t take my medication until this pandemic is over. If we all collectively do what we are supposed to flatten the curve, we can all go back to normal soon. Don’t think that you’re stuck at home, you’re actually safe at home. Stay healthy, and stay home!
